Concert etiquette: Sir, put your phone down
You just spent the last 45 minutes outside in a single file line, waiting for the doors to open. I’m not talking crazy Black Friday shopping madness.
I’m talking about the anticipation felt before a concert.
It’s your favorite band and a tiny venue, so you braved the cold to ensure your front and center spot, practically bumping elbows with the band. The night is going to be epic, you’re sure.
You even made successful small talk outside with strangers, bonding over the same favorite song from seventh grade. Tonight will be one to remember, you think.
The doors open, you proudly show your ID and rush up the stairs and secure your spot. The opening acts are surprisingly decent, and then finally the moment you’ve been waiting for all night … The main event.
No matter how hard you tried, somehow in the midst of the singing and swaying, you’ve been pushed to the left with an obstructed view thanks to two guys who are without a doubt basketball player height.
If you’re anything like me, you never realize just how short you are until you’re at a concert. It’s suddenly like a tall people convention was shuttled in and you’re sorely out of place, all 5-foot-4 of you.
To make matters worse, Devin (let’s name him Devin) stands holding his iPad at eye level, recording the whole concert.
It’s annoying for literally every other person in there. I can’t even imagine being a musician, staring into the crowd only to be met with camera flashes, recording lights and the backs of Mac logos.
I’ve been there, recording my favorite songs in hopes the live version will spark something different, an extended verse or an ad-libbed phrase.
But please, for the love of all notes holy, there’s nothing worse than viewing the concert from a stranger’s iPad when you’re an arm’s distance away from the stage.
We understand it’s your favorite song, it’s you and your boyfriend’s song, it’s the song you’re going to get lyrics tattooed from … but come on, soak it up.
You’re seeing it live. Don’t make me get a megaphone and embarrass you in front of everyone: “Sir, put the phone down and no one gets hurt.”